Closing the Gap – Loving Where You Are

When I lived in Colorado, I did a lot of hiking. The mountains are so beautiful and there is nothing like the sounds of nature. One of those beautiful Rocky Mountain summer days, I was winding up the path to the top of a hiking trail and enjoying my time outside of the busy city. After a few hours, I noticed that my legs were starting to burn and I looked forward to reaching the summit. My mind shifted to focus on the destination and I quickly tuned out the singing birds, the waterfalls and the fresh air. I turned another corner only to find out that I still had such a long way to go.

At that point I was thinking about how out of shape I was, how I miscalculated the length of the passage to the top and if I should just turn around and go back. Out of breath, I stopped to take a break and then I looked behind me and noticed how far I had travelled up the mountain. My car was a tiny speck in the distance and I couldn’t believe how high I climbed. I was back in the moment, feeling proud of myself and how far I had come. I was able to hear the leaves ruffle in the wind and enjoy the view. The gap between where I was and where I wanted to be was closed. The last leg of the trip was pure joy as I was present to all the sights around me, even with sore muscles and tired feet. When I had reached to top, it was a good feeling to reach the goal but I knew that the gift was in the journey.

This story is such a great metaphor for life. Is there a gap between where you are and where you want to be? Are you waiting for your true love or for the next promotion? Maybe you are waiting to be happy until your vacation starts. The feeling of dissatisfaction does not come because the things you want have not materialized, but in the idea that what you want is going to make your life any better or happier.

When you create goals for your business or personal life, they aren’t supposed to be there to put your life on hold until they are achieved. Goals help enrich your life, not make your life. If you have the attitude that it isn’t enough right now, it will never be enough. You will always want more—more dates, more attention, more commitment, more money, more status, another business deal, etc.  You will relentlessly riding a treadmill that goes nowhere and leaves you constantly dissatisfied with your life.

The gap between where you are and where you want to be is created by your mind. The gap is a story you tell yourself about your life and how much better things will become one day. To truly find joy in life is to close the gap. Find ways to generate a full feeling about life instead of starving for something (or someone) to save you.

The secret to attracting unlimited abundance and love is to feel as if you already have it. Your subconscious mind cannot see the future and only creates what it already knows. If you want to shift your life in a new direction, you must create the space for the deep mind to build upon. It could form your life upon the idea of not enough or upon more than enough…your choice.

To generate the belief that you already have more than enough, turn around and take a good assessment of how far you have come in your life. Become conscious of all of your wonderful qualities and accomplishments. Really feel so proud of who you are and where you are right now. If you focus every day on a sense of fullness, you will keep attracting more good things into your life. You will always have more than enough of whatever you want if you believe you have it all right here and now. Everything out there is a mirror of your deep beliefs inside. You cannot escape your mind and it can make your life a heaven or a hell. Getting something external may temporarily make you feel good but will ultimately never be enough if you have the mindset of “not enough.” Conversely, if you have the belief that you are more than enough, even the tiniest of accomplishments will be celebrated with incredible joy.

So, the next time you find yourself wishing you were somewhere else, jump back in the moment and close the gap. Take a deep breath, exhale and say, “I have more than enough and everything I need is here for me.” Interesting things happen out there when you do this inside, but most importantly you don’t have to put off feeling good any longer.

Stress Free Holidays – Be Healthy, Wealthy & Calm

This week I did an hour teleseminar hosted by my good friend, Connie Bennett, author of Sugar Shock! We know this time of year brings up a plethora of emotions as we face overindulging in sweets, spending and family drama. We are offering a free replay for the month of December so that you can experience some LIVE HYPNOSIS (I do three short sessions) and explain how the subconscious mind rules your life and how to get in control of your destiny.

I created two special packages for this event at a greatly-reduced price:

Listen to the podcast below and here are links to the special product packages:

COMPLETE RELAXATION MP3 SET – 9 PROGRAMS FOR ONLY $67

WEIGHT LOSS MP3 SET – 4 PROGRAMS FOR ONLY $39

Stress-Relief Holiday Seminar – Click Here to Play

Battling Negative Thinking by Watering the Rose

When you realize that your thoughts create your life, at first you may feel liberated and think, “That’s easy, I’ll just change my thoughts.” However, when you attempt to shift the mind from its old patterns, a great resistance presents itself within you and you begin an internal battle. Your pattern of thinking has been consistent for decades and you cannot just flip a switch and become super-positive and attract a car, a lover, a house or a job overnight. The process of transforming your habits of thinking takes some time and effort but the rewards are amazing.

Of course, the fastest and most effective way to shift your thinking is using self-hypnosis because it works with the subconscious mind (the roots of your thinking). When your mind is in a relaxed state of trance, it is open to new ideas and allows the deep mind to absorb positive messages. It takes 1,000 affirmations to match the power of one affirmation in a hypnotic state. Depending on the person, it could take 30-90 days of regular daily practice to make a permanent shift in the subconscious about a certain core belief. During that time, the battle on the conscious level begins and many misinterpret this as the hypnosis isn’t working. The reality is that the closer you are to change, the louder the opposing force of thought becomes. It is actually working exactly as it should and there are ways to help it along by being present with your thinking throughout the day.

I recently came up with a great metaphor that may help you as you shift your thinking. Imagine that you have two potted plants in front of you. One pot contains a large, overgrown weed that contains all of the thoughts, ideas, beliefs that are not supporting what you want. The weed represents thoughts that are disempowering, negative and hurtful. Then, in the other pot imagine a beautiful rose. That rose represents the part of you that loves you, believes in you and attracts wonderful people, success and creativity into your life. Your focus directs which pot you water. So if you focus on the negative thoughts, you are watering the weed and it will grow larger and become more powerful. If you stop yourself and focus on the good in you and life, you are watering the rose.

You water the rose each time you listen to a self-hypnosis program, every time you do something nice for yourself or others, every time you think of someone you love or loves you, and every time you say “no” and keep your boundaries. You may not notice a big change overnight, but eventually that rose will grow into a large beautiful rose bush with lots of buds and a wonderful fragrance. The weed , without attention, will wither away and become weak. The negative thinking will slow down to a quiet whisper. There is a tipping point when you automatically water the rose without having to train yourself and you will naturally feel more confident, loving and positive about your life.

When you feel good naturally, you will be in the flow. You seem to be the lucky one, attracting opportunities, loving people, money, success and all those bonuses that you want in life. Regardless of what shows up, you just feel better. Remember, you get what you focus on so keep watering the rose and you’ll start to sing, “everything’s coming up roses!” in your life.

Law of Attraction Anxiety: What is the Real Secret?

Many people have seen the DVDs, read the books, attended the seminars to attract romance, wealth and more, but still are not getting results. In the areas of money and love, so many have tied their hopes and dreams of finding that magic ticket to become a millionaire or meet the love of their life. The problem is not that the law of attraction does not work, but most people attempt to create from fear. Sadly, many self-help experts thrive on that fear to sell their products that feed the addiction of external gratification. This process is ineffective and will keep you buying more products that do not work if built on the foundation of perceived lack.

Thinking that more money or having a mate will make you happy leads you down a path of unfulfilled expectations. In addition, being hard on yourself for not being successful, judging your current circumstances as wrong and believing that something is wrong with you that needs to be fixed will keep you stuck. What you resist will persist and the anxiety you feel about not having those things will be a persistent until you let it go. Your subconscious mind perceives the feeling of lack and continues to give you that experience until you change your energy.

I am not taking about giving up on your dreams but acknowledging that there is nothing that can change in your external environment that will ever make you happier than you can be right now. Happiness is a choice and is solely based on your own perception. Even in times of complete devastation, you are free to interpret your circumstances. You are the one who decides what everything means.

When I was single, I had so much anxiety about my love life. I wondered when my time would come when my true love would find me and whisk me away from that awful singles world. After I met my boyfriend, who is absolutely incredible, I knew that I was still me and life was not all that different.

Years later, I left my thriving practice in Denver and moved to New York City. I had to start my business over again, money was tight and it took a while to generate momentum. In the first few months, I meditated everyday to help ease my financial stress. One day, as I sat there unable to face my anxiety any longer, a thought came to my head that shifted the tension forever. “Don’t you remember when you used to worry like this over finding a man?” There it was…life’s never-ending pursuit of something to get better…right in my face.

I realized that no matter what you seem to get in life, there will be always more that you need if you are dependent upon external forces to bring you happiness. Feeling as if the power is outside of you, it is no wonder that you would feel small and fearful. The anxiety that is created by lack of money or love must be addressed in order to be fully at peace. If not, you will be clinging on to any money that comes in or the first man that arrives, remaining in a state of uncertainty and turmoil throughout your life.

You see, what you really want is to feel good, not money or love. You are tricked to believe that joy comes in a nice fat check or the sexiest man or woman alive. A sense of happiness can be realized within you right now and supersedes any attachment to results that previously kept you in a state of panic. Working with the felt sense in your body and using visualization to release the tension is a powerful tool in discovering your own inner peace.

Self-hypnosis is the perfect technique to alleviate panic because it not only brings you to a state of extraordinary relaxation, but works with the subconscious gunk that caused the discomfort in the first place.

Once the anxiety is cleared and you have peace of mind, you can freely attract any of those external bonuses whenever you want. When they arrive, you will be amazed at how little they add to your sense of joy since you already found greater elation inside. Once you discover your own well of joy that is abundant within you, you will never feel lack again.

There is a myth that life gets better. This moment is all you have. Stop wasting it on thinking about what you don’t have and be grateful for this precious human life that is right here, right now before it goes away.

Check out my free teleseminar on Money Anxiety Freedom!

How Hypnosis Works – Life Coach TV Interview

Check out my interview on Life Coach TV in NYC. It is 30 minutes in length and separated into three sections for size consideration. Here I explain to Laurie Lawson of the International Coaches Federation – NYC Chapter Vice President the benefits of hypnosis and how it can help coaches get faster results for their clients. Learn the myths of hypnosis, the power of the subconscious mind and what stops you from reaching your goals. How hypnosis can help you shift your life in a new direction.

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Free Energy Grounding & Chakra Clearing Meditation

There is more to you than flesh and blood. There is an energy that flows through you and all around you that connects to all that is. You may think your body is separate but people read each other’s energy all the time. Having a clear energy system can make a difference in how attractive you are to money, love or having good health.

This free 8-minute audio is a Chakra Balancing and Energy Grounding exercise that you can do every day. You will notice profound differences in your thinking and sense of feeling in sync with your desires when your energy is in balance.

Many people are living in their heads and practically “out of their body” most of the time. They seek external sources for love and support because they feel empty. Once you learn how to connect to the earth and bring your energy field into your body and balance the systems within that energy, you can see an amazing difference in how you feel and act in the world.

Here is a brief review of the chakras, where they are located and what they represent. Refer to the image to see exact placement. You may notice that when you are experiencing an issue, the chakra related is the one that feels congested or stuck. By clearing the area with this mediation, you can deal with your situation more easily and access the divine guidance within you to lead you to the next level of your experience. Note that the chakras spin out and create your personal energy field which extends beyond your physical body somewhere between three to six feet, depending on your state of mind.

1^st – Base of Spine (RED) – Grounding/Sexuality

2^nd-  Just below the navel (ORANGE) – Relationships with Others/Reproduction/Creativity

3^rd – Solar Plexus- just beneath the rib cage (YELLOW) – Self Worth, Relationship to Your Self

4^th – Heart -center chest (GREEN) – Love

5^th – Throat (BLUE) – Communication

6^th – Third Eye -forehead/brow- (INDIGO) – Intuition

7^th – Crown of Head (VIOLET) – Connection to Spirit

Simply select the link and a player will appear and select the play button to relax and enjoy this quick 8-minute grounding energy and chakra clearing exercise.

Dealing with Perfection when Dating

If you struggle in love, you are probably one of those people who claim to be a perfectionist. The root belief of that type of personality is about not being good enough. No matter how good your life can be there is always that voice inside that says it could be better. Even when you have a fantastic date, you start to pick apart their faults. If someone breaks up with you, immediately you begin to wonder what you did wrong.

Many perfectionists have grown up in critical households. Rarely complimented and highly judged, they become their own worse enemy as their parents comments become their own voice inside their minds. To make up for this imbalance, these people strive for success but are seldom satisfied with whatever goals they reach. When good things happen, they tend to label their fortune as luck and have anxiety about being worthy of having it all.

Some singles with this belief will find fault with the nice guys/girls they date saying “they are not good enough.” At the same time, these searchers give their heart away to people who treat them poorly because they really believe on a deep level “they themselves are not good enough.” The nice guys/girls who get rejected start to feel “not good enough” and the cycle continues where a healthy relationship is rare in our society.

When I was single, I used to constantly work on personal improvement. I knew if I just made myself a little better that someone would finally love me. Anytime I would start to feel good about myself, a guy would stop calling and I felt like a failure again. Then on to another workshop to become someone better, more appealing, more loveable so that I could finally earn the right to be in a healthy relationship. In other words, I had perfection so tightly related to having a partner that I was blocking love because I was never felt perfect. You simply cannot be in two places at the same time.

The problem with the term personal improvement is that it is a illusory idea. This concept assumes that people are broken and need to be fixed, improved upon to fit in with all of the normal people in the world. If God made man in his likeness, don’t you think there is possibly at least a little bit of perfection in all of us?

Becoming your best self does not have to mean that you are learning something new because you already have perfection built in. The process is more about letting go of the false ideas that you picked up through your life, so that you can rediscover that inner light that is so bright and perfect within you.

When I started to distinguish between my human foibles and my true divine nature, I became free. Learning to accept my human behaviors and forgive myself for past mistakes, I let go of making that human part of me wrong, bad or incompetent. By looking at myself with soft eyes, even when I am at my worse, I can accept a partner in my life who will love me completely as well.

Stop picking yourself apart and shut off the voice that says be thinner, smarter, richer, funnier, more adventurous or whatever. Shift your mind to love even the times when you find it hard to love you. You know it is much easier to love someone when they are good but it takes wisdom to love them when they disappoint us. The best news is that you do not need to change a thing, only your perception of yourself.

All of my life I was searching for someone to love me. I discovered that she has been inside all along, just waiting for me give her hug and tell me that I am perfect just the way I am. Ultimately, I attracted a man into my life who agrees with her.

Attract Healthier Relationships with Hypnosis

The key to using the law of attraction for love and relationships is to change your SUBCONSCIOUS mind. If you just know what you are doing wrong, nothing will change. In order to have a lasting, loving relationship, your deeper mind must be in alignment. Are you ready for real love?

Take the first step by getting my Attract Healthy Relationships Hypnosis MP3 program. Only $19.97 if you download it today.

Attract Love of Your Life with Hypnosis Interview

Love Coach and Hypnotist, Debra Berndt explains how the subconscious mind affects your dating life. Use her attract love visualization hypnosis programs to shift your attraction magnet to meet true love.
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Let Go of Past Relationships

Do you have a hard time letting go of someone or something from
your past? Whether he/she is an ex-husband or ex-wife or family
member that caused you pain?

This lack of completion can be the reason why you struggle in your love life. If you are ready to release that person or event once and for all, join me for my next live teleseminar:

EVENT IS OVER – Visit my replay page at AttractRealLove.com

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